Monthly Archives: July 2018

BREAKING: New Owner of Trump Baby Blimp Highly Delighted With eBay Purchase

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PC Ted Stupor: The Drink-Ravaged London Bobby You Can Trust

The Whitechapel Whelk

PC Ted (New) - Copy

Evenin’ all

Policing a huge and diverse city like London can be an exacting and even perilous business at times, where myself and my colleagues frequently put our own safety firmly on the line.

Take Tuesday evening as an example. My team were sent to police the Thames Walk area around London Bridge where thousands of England football fans had gathered to watch the World Cup clash against Colombia on the big screen.

My prime concern was that people would be drinking heavily, both prior to, and during the game, and that trouble could ensue as a result.

So, with this in mind, I began confiscating alcohol from people at London Bridge station on the off chance that they could be potential troublemakers.

By 7.00 pm, I had more than enough to see me through the evening and ended up being sick down the front of a woman’s dress during…

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