BREAKING: Storm Eleanor upgraded to ThunderBitchCockBasher

Wind-Warning

The powerful storm which is due to hit parts of Britain overnight has now been upgraded to a ThunderBitchCockBasher say The Met Office.

Veteran forecaster, Bill McCaskill, told us: “Eleanor is now officially a ThunderBitchCockBasher and could cause significant damage in exposed areas. Particularly to exposed cocks.

“The Met Office is advising anyone thinking of making an unnecessary journey with their cock out to think again. Especially women, who will be totally unused to having their cocks bashed and could easily become hysterical”

The storm has already hit the west coast of Ireland with people reporting flying wellies in coastal areas and with one woman reporting waves of over 9 feet on the top of her draught Guinness.

Please dont tweet or otherwise share any content found on here. The editor of the magazine that runs this stuff gets as angry as fuck. Thanks – Ed.

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