Absolutely miles over. Hurst slams in Englands decisive and totally legit 3rd goal in ’66
Previously hidden documents related to the 1963 assassination of President John F Kennedy, have revealed that Kennedy built a time machine in his shed at The White House and had used it to travel forward in time to 1966 where he attended the World Cup Final between England and West Germany.
When Kennedy arrived back he wrote in his diary that Geoff Hurst’s hotly disputed winning goal in extra time had definitely crossed the line “by at least a foot”
The document now proves beyond any shadow of a doubt that Hurst’s wonder strike was a legitimate goal and should finally put a stop to the Germans constantly going on about it.
The world’s media have now accepted the news, apart from The Scotsman newspaper, who have dubbed the findings, ‘fake news’ and have referred to Kennedy as a ‘sad loser’ in today’s editorial.
Tinfoil twat: A typical Youtube conspiracy genius pictured last night
The Federal Bureau of Investigation last night announced that they have arrested and charged, The Duke of Edinburgh, Prince Philip, with the mass shootings in Las Vegas on October 1, after an agent spotted a link posted by a member of the public on Youtube which pointed the finger at the 90-year-old husband of Her Majesty The Queen.
An FBI spokesman said last night: “If only we’d looked on Youtube earlier. I just wish it had been around at the time of The Boston Strangler, we’d have saved an awful lot of time and effort and no mistake.
Scotland Yard are now also believed to be looking at Youtube footage and have already established that Bruce Forsythe was Jack The Ripper and that Margaret Thatcher’s nan was the fearsome, Beast of Belsen.
If you’re a slow-witted, overly-excitable dullard with a crackpot theory on the solution to any really tricky unsolved crimes during the last century or so, post your thoughts on Youtube so that the rest of us can all have a bloody good laugh and a point at your expense.
More as we get it