Local man blows off own genitals during Valentine’s firework stunt to impress girlfriend

The Whitechapel Whelk

fireworks-roman_candle Fire down below: A firework similar to the one that blew Mr Dell’s cock and balls off.

A 19-year-old Whitechapel man was being treated in hospital for serious burns last night after a pre-Valentine’s Day stunt ended in tragedy.

Casey Dell, an unemployed diesel fitter, had placed a lit roman candle down the front of his trousers, intending to unzip his fly in front of his girlfriend and treat her to an impressive firework ‘display’.

Sadly, things went tragically wrong when Mr Dell discovered that his zip had jammed and that he was unable to remove the firework, which then exploded repeatedly inside his underpants, resulting in the loss of the unfortunate lothario’s penis and one of his testicles.

Mr Dell was heavily sedated last night and was unable to comment, but we did manage to speak to his girlfriend, Tracy Carter, a 17-year-old hairdresser, who told The Whelk: “He…

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