A 40-year-old contributor on the WordPress blogging site expressed surprise last night after being told that not one of his pieces has any merit whatsoever, despite having written thousands over the last 4 years.
Mr Marvin Hinchcliff, from Sunderland, Tyne and Wear, was given the shattering news that his entire back catalogue of work was utter tripe by a publishing house when he sent them a collection of his prose and poetry, with a view to getting a book deal.
Mr. Hinchcliff told us yesterday: “They were pretty damning, to be honest. They told me my copy was a joke and that it was strewn with schoolboy spelling errors and that the grammar and syntax could have been more adeptly handled by a Sumatran gibbon.
“I just can’t believe it in all honesty. I mean to say, all the people on WordPress, whose work I routinely fawn over, despite not actually reading any of it, told me I was Steinbeck, Chesterton and Byron all rolled into one”
Mr Hinchcliff’s misery was made complete yesterday when the manuscript for his forthcoming self-published book was sent back to him accompanied by a rejection slip.
SATIRIST’S NOTE: No fragile egos or delusional aspirations were damaged during the writing of this piece