Dear Soz


Dear Soz Satire

I have managed to fool my next door neighbours into thinking I’m a South American Manatee by piling on an excessive amount of weight, painting myself grey, and laying just beneath the surface of their fishpond with a benign, moronic expression on my face. For added authenticity, I have administered a number of deep cuts to my body to simulate the mutilations caused by the propellers of speed boats. I’ve even learned a smattering of Spanish in case they pull me out and start asking questions. The gullible fools don’t suspect a thing.

Toby Attenborough

The Galapagos Islands

For more banal gags and the heartless lampooning of perfectly innocent marine mammals, for God’s sake don’t visit:

No good will come of it, trust me.


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