He gotta big face.
Following the decision yesterday to award damages to the family of soul legend, Marvin Gaye, on the grounds that his hit single, Got To Give It Up, had been copied by pop stars, Robin Thicke and Pharell Williams, in breach of copyright laws, the German manufacturers of a tunnel-boring machine are to sue British pop icon, Olly Murs, whose last single, Troublemaker, they claim is a direct copy of the noise made by their gigantic ‘mole’ as it bores into solid granite during the construction of road and rail tunnels.
A spokesperson for Herrenecht AG told a press conference:
“The similarity between the ear-splitting, grating noise made by our tunnelling machines and Murs’s vocals in his last single is unmistakeable and we intend to defend our copyright integrity in a court of law”.
Murs, whose gigantic face and notoriously abysmal pop songs have attracted derision, ridicule, and dismay in equal measure, was unavailable for comment last night as he is currently allowing his big face to be used as a makeshift helipad for British forces in the war-torn middle east, but his mother, Enid, 107, told us:
“I’ve no idea whether Olly deliberately mimicked the sound made by an industrial tunnelling machine or not to be honest with you. However, I shouldn’t be at all surprised if he had. I mean to say, have you heard it? It’s an absolute, fucking shocker”
Tone Deaf Tribune