Mature Men Online Dating Site Folds After One Week


fat 2

A saucy model pictured posing provocatively for the doomed site.

An adult orientated online dating site which featured a number of middle-aged and elderly men in saucy poses has been taken down following disastrous viewing statistics since its creation just seven days ago.

“Red Hot Papas” recorded just two hits during its brief existence, one of which was from the site’s owner who wanted to check to see how it was faring, and the other was from a man in Honduras who mistakenly thought it was something to do with cooking exotic fruit.

The site featured revealing photographs of paunchy, red-faced white men in their 50s and 60s with hairy backs and spidery legs, striking raunchy, come-hither poses wearing just their discoloured underwear and diamond socks. Some were captured in their string vests, sprawling provocatively across stained sofas with the stuffing coming out, while others were photographed sitting on the toilet with their pants around their ankles holding a roll of toilet paper in front of their genitals in a suggestive manner.

We asked two of the young women in the Soz Satire office to give their opinion on the site. One appeared visibly shaken and said: “Ewwww that’s so gross! I mean to say, what the fuck!” The other one threw her lunch in the wastepaper basket and told me that she’d “just been a bit sick in her mouth”

In the interests of gender equality, we also asked a gay member of staff to give an opinion. Sports editor, Gary Hoadley, 93, clamped both hands over his mouth, snapped his eyes shut and shrieked “Oh for God’s sake take it away darling, I think I’m going to die!”




Leave a comment

Filed under Satire

Comments are closed.