“OK limeys, now hear this. Shit happens. So get over it why doncha?”
Reports are coming in that a number of US fighter bombers have attacked and sunk a small rowing boat on The River Thames at Oxford. The boat, manned by 8 members of The Oxford University reserve rowing crew, known as Isis, was completely destroyed with all hands lost in what is believed to be a bungled attempt to kill a group of Islamic insurgents in the small town of Tikrit, 40 miles north of the Iraqi capital, Baghdad.
A spokesman for The United States Air Force responded in bullish fashion when told of the mix up last night.
“A limey boat crew taken out you say? Well how the hell were we supposed to know? Goddamn it what are these dumb sonsofbitches doing naming themselves after a bunch of no good jihadist fucks anyways? If you ask me they got no more than they deserved!”
This latest incident comes just a few days after a US Navy destroyer torpedoed a 23 year old British woman holidaymaker who was snorkling off the coast of Israel, claiming they thought she was a Palestinian nuclear submarine.